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Kristina
Avery
Hannah
Cast:
Upper Class-
Upper-upper class-Paris Hilton the Sock
Upper-lower class-Oprah Winfrey the Sock
Upper-middle class- Doc the Sock
Lower-middle class- Ms. Price the Sock
Working class- Bob the walmart worker Sock
Working poor- Ronald McDonald the Sock
The underclass- Cat Lady the Sock (with her special guest stars, Ginga, Snowball, and Mittens.)

Oprah: Hi, welcome to my show. Today we’ll be talking about social classes. Lets all give a very special round of applause to today’s guest stars. (audience applauds wildly) Our first guest is the ever so famous Paris Hilton.
Paris: Hello everyone!
Oprah: How about you tell us what class rank you are in?
Paris: I’d love to, Oprah. I’m in the upper-upper class. You see, my family has had money for like, ever. We’re very prestigious. Isn’t that right fluffykins? (dog barks approvingly.)
Oprah: That certainly is lovely. Perhaps you would like to take a seat over there? (Paris goes and sits down.) Our next guest is…Me! (audience mumbles confused) I am in the Lower-Upper class. I earned all of my own money through hard work! It didn’t come through past generations. Even though I don’t have as much prestige as Paris, I’m still pretty darn prestigious. Now our next guest (who isn’t me!) is Doc the Sock! (Doc enters and audience cheers) Tell us what class you’re in.
Doc: Hey, my names Doctor Sock. But you call me Doc the Sock. I’m in the Upper-Middle Class. I had a great college education and now I make lots of money because I’m a professional. I work very hard at what I do.
Oprah: That certainly is very impressive. Go take a seat besides Paris.
Doc: I’d love to.
Oprah: Our next guest is Ms. Price (audience cheers uber exicitedly. Ms. Price enters like a kid going into a candy store for the first time.)
Ms. Price: Hi Oprah!
Oprah: Hello!
Ms. Price: I always knew I’d be on your show!
Oprah: Heh heh. How about you tell us what your class is?
Ms. Price: I’d love to! I’m an expert on these things! I am in the lower-middle class. I’m a teacher! (audience applauds wildly) I don’t make as much money as Doc the Sock but I did go to college and got a good education!
Oprah: Okay, please take a seat next to Doc.
Ms. Price: Wait, I haven’t told you about all my great ideas! You see, I made this review game and it was amazing and all the kids loved it and-
Oprah: Please, sit down, we’re out of time.
Ms. Price: wait, there’s another thing! I also had this idea of square donuts!
Oprah: PLEASE sit down NOW! (Ms. Price sulks over to her seat and sits down. Audience says “aww.”) Our next guest is Bob!
Bob: Hey Oprah.
Oprah: What do you do, Bob, and what is your class?
Bob: Well, I work at wal-mart. I’m in the Working class. Cause I work at wal-mart, you know? (in the background we hear Ms. Price say “wal-mart sucks!”)
Oprah: My that certainly is fascinating.
Bob: Fun fact! Did you know that the largest segment of the American population is in the working class?
Oprah: why no, I did not! What else do people in the working class do?
Bob: Well, we do a lot of manual labor. Some people in the working class make as much as Lower-Middle class people do. But we don’t get as much prestige.
Oprah: Aw, you poor thing. Here, have a free car.
Ms. Price: Hey, I used to work at wal-mart too! Do I get a free car?
Oprah: SIT DOWN! Ahem. Our next guest is Ronald McDonald the sock. Come on out Ronald.
Ronald: Hey guys. How you doin’?
Oprah: Tell us about what you do Ronald.
Ronald: Well, I was a high school drop out. I’ve been working at McDonalds for about twenty years now. I’m in the Working Poor class. I don’t make much money. I don’t really make enough money to live on, so I depend on government programs.
Oprah: Aw, you poor thing! Have a free house!
Ms. Price: WHAT?!
Oprah: SIT DOWN!!! Okay, our last guest is…um…Ms. Crazy Cat Lady?
Cat Lady: Meow!
Oprah: Um, would you mind explaining that?
Cat Lady: I don’t have a job! I’m old and all I got is my cats! I’m in the underclass! I live on public assistance. Wanna see my cat?
Oprah: sure…
Ginga: Meow!
Cat Lady: That’s Ginga, she’s my favorite!
Oprah: well, tell us more about your life.
Cat Lady: I live on the street. In a box. Wanna see Mittens?
Oprah: You mean, like, keep your hands warm Mittens?
Cat Lady: No! That’s absurd. Mittens my cat!
Oprah: Uh. Well that’s nice, but moving right along, I’m going to give you a free house, a free car, and a free mini house for your cats!
Ms. Price: What is this?!
Cat Lady: and this is snowball..and this is-
(Snowball gets chased off stage by Paris’s dog. The other cats follow and so does Cat Lady)
Cat Lady: Ohh mittens!
Paris: fluffikins, noo! (Paris runs offstage)
Doc: Don’t worry, I’m a docter! (Doc runs offstage)
Bob: I can help you! I know where the cat litter section is! (Bob runs offstage)
Ronald: If all else fails, I can make you cheeseburgers! (Ronald runs offstage)
Oprah: Oh, by the way studio audience. Look under your chairs. You’ve all got keys to your free new yacht!
(crowd cheers crazily)
Ms.Price: Whyyyyyy?!
[Scene]