things, which start out to be simple, turn out in the end as a confusing twist to a story. In these matters, its love, gaian love. This situation of mine troubles my mind, the circle I have gone ever since those words first came to my mind. I've been married, doubts gone through my mind, watched my husband die, a time of sorrow which was unusually short (I admit that), the feeling of true love pulling at my heart, feeling the love grow away from the eyes of others, and then knowing that that love has been turning in a strange direction I did not notice. So basicly, my love here on gaia has slowly crept from gaia, and left me confused about my situation here on gaia.
Still I feel satisfied and loved, I love him. One person becoming two so I would not get harmed by his enemies. I cant help but feel a bit overly protected. But things are as they are, and I love him.
But its true, many do hate him, and he is basicly a legend around some places. So many creatures I care about would not approve of this, beacause most of them have even sworn to kill him.
Its troubling, but still, I wouldnt have cared about those things if he wouldnt. But I see now that he cared about what was going on around him, and didnt want me to be pulled into it. Running around in circles wont fix or change things..... Im still in the same tracks.
If anyone can make more sense out of this then, lucky you.
(im sure that no comments lead to the thought 'no one cares' ninja thats fine... I dont think I get that many comments on things that trouble me, because it gets so long that no one will take the time to read it (talking about 'last week'), exept a few creatures I know off , have a freakingly nice easter.... )
suddenly I feel like Im complaining, am I complaining? I dont want to be complaining... but my own son (adopted) is staring at me like he has been let down. I feel let down because of that... (though I wonder where he found out, its not like I was hiding it, but still I wasnt showing it) do I always feel like Im doing things wrong in everybodies elses eyes, am I doing something wrong? if its wrong what I do, I would still do them, but when people look at me like Im not what they thought I was, that is just... just disapointing, if thats the word Im looking for, I feel hurt.
w00t w00t... yeah.. this is a lil edit... I desided (though it was already desided, in a way o.o') the word taken is the word for me [chuckles] though here on gaia, its still a bit strange o.o' (and for those who think 'out side of gaia' then its not irl xp yeah... some people ask)
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erotic, not exotic... fruits are exotic
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Dark stardragon
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~Lavi