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Kyon' s personal poem
I will write mostly poems in here. Please don't steal the poems that I have written and put my heart into.
I do not understand poems
I do not understand
fighting and cheating
People babbaling
Lying
I understand feelings of love least of all,
but i do understand why people love.

I do not understand
dieing and overeating
People killing
funerals
I understand losing someone least of all,
but I do understand people's hearts healing inside.






User Comments: [6] [add]
DR4G0NG1RL
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Wed Jan 03, 2007 @ 02:40am
This is pretty good.
I feel like the last line didn't quite fit though
since you were trying to have some ammount of repition
I think maybe instead you should have a "why" question in there
like in the first stanza.

Otherwise I liked it
and that is only personal pereference.


commentCommented on: Wed Jan 03, 2007 @ 06:24am
Thanks
The sample poem she gave me had I don't understand alot in it too.
I ll consider changing it.



kyonichi4
Community Member
Cour8ge2StandAlone
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Tue Jan 09, 2007 @ 02:12am
I liked it, but try using more Figurative Language. Diction and Tone will help alot, also. Might i also suggest breaking the lines into the more powerful statements: try dividing the lines into what you really want to emphazise.
It is really nice, but could use more underlying thought and Tone...
XOXO:
Kitty


commentCommented on: Sat Jan 13, 2007 @ 02:06am
Thanks for the advise.
I might just re do the whole poem.
I m still pondering on that.



kyonichi4
Community Member
breakface2
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Fri Jun 08, 2007 @ 02:12pm
yes


commentCommented on: Fri Jun 08, 2007 @ 03:46pm
Yes to what?



kyonichi4
Community Member
User Comments: [6] [add]
 
 
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