January 7th, 2009 8:00 am
As me and Ryan were driving down the back roads in Virginia we could feel an absence, we heard nothing but silence, it was a cold silence. Nobody was around for miles, the road was covered in cars that had dried blood encasing every inch. We found a semi-truck laying on its side collecting small amounts of dust as the wind swirled around. Ryan stopped in front of the truck. He swung his arm into the backseat and underneath a flap in the fabric laid a semi-automatic pistol.
“Stay here.” Ryan said as he unlocked the door stepping into the hot summer heat.
The leather seats that padded Ryan's car started to singe my skin, it was like I was being baked alive. I kept my eyes on Ryan before suddenly he got out of view. Worried as I was I grabbed my knife and abandoned the car.
“Ryan! where are you?” I hollered. No response. I kept walking till I found a gas station, every car had either broken windows or some sort of cosmetic damage.
“Ryan!” I called out again. Standing about 10 feet away was Ryan, pistol in hand, aimed at a small child's head. Pure horror filled my eyes. I looked closer at the child, her face pale and sullen, her eyes bloodshot and her mouth torn to shreds, while a wine colored liquid dripped from her mouth. I screamed.
January 28th, 2009 12:30 pm
It’s been weeks. I can’t even remember the last time I saw another human’s face, excluding Ryan's. We've encountered things, things you wouldn't begin to believe. We barely made it out alive, barely made it anywhere safe. Ryan did nothing but keep his eyes locked straight on the road, he never wanted to talk about anything. I would try constantly to get him to pull over for just a few moments, just so that we could figure this all out, make some sense out of it. He refused, and to be frank I have no idea why he’s so afraid to talk about the truth.
“Ryan, would you please just pull over so we can get this over with? I'm sick and tired of the constant silence from you, from everything. We have been driving up and down these roads for weeks, we barely managed to eat something without being attacked, and you feel the need to act like nothings happened. Look around you Ryan, this world of ours, yeah it’s gone to s**t, and it’s gonna get worse real fast, so I suggest you stop this car right now, or ill get out and ditch your sorry a**, because I have a life worth living, and I’d like to keep it that way. I don’t need you slowing me down, you’re only making things harder for yourself by not accepting the truth.” I screamed. Ryan's muscles were tensing around his hands. I slumped back into my seat waiting for him to scream back at me, but he didn't.
“You’re right.” he says calmly. I look at him confused. “You’re agreeing with me? After all this time you have been sitting there ignoring me for weeks on end, and you knew I was right?! You have got to be kidding me! Pull over right now.” I was beyond furious. Ryan looked around to see if it was safe. He pulled over to the side by a street light, and cut the engine.
“You’re right, Sam, I have been being a total a*****e, it’s not that i'm afraid of the truth, i’m afraid of accepting it. Everything was fine between us, but these past few weeks has turned us into something different, I can’t stand how I feel, well because I honestly don’t know how I feel. I don’t understand what’s happening or why, all I know is that we have to survive, we need to survive. We can’t let them win, that’s what life is about right? it’s about survival.”
October 5th, 2008 9:00 am
“Yeah, listen mom alright. Ryan’s great and all but he just doesn't know his left from his right. I’m always the one cleaning up after him, always doing his dirty work. He never gives me a break.” I whisper into the phone. “Is that so?” mom says. I try to keep myself busy while, I walk into the kitchen and see that there’s a stack of dirty dishes untouched. I sigh. “Yes, it is so. It’s like I can’t even get a break anymore, he’s constantly lying to me sneaking out in the middle of the night just like he’s 16” I grab the soap from under the sink and begin to make a small pool of soap and water. “Talk to him, don’t give him the satisfaction. Let him know what you want to change, maybe he’ll see your point of view.” Mom said quietly. I laughed because well I knew that Ryan only wants what's best for him not for me. “Something needs to change, maybe it’s me.” I took the plates that were stacked and put them in the soapy water to soak. “Oh honey, you’re perfect, don’t let somebody tell you how things should be, you don’t need to change, he just needs to see that.” Mom said sweetly.
I nodded without giving it a thought. Mom was right I had to convince Ryan that he needs to haul a** and see that i’m not just some piece of meat.
I ended up falling asleep waiting for Ryan to get home. He was out, I didn't know where, it’s not like he wanted me to know. I guess I was okay with it but in reality I was tired of him, I needed to straighten this out, because it’s only going to make my life more of a mess then it already is.
hiya, im mei
art freebs | art insta | twitter
art freebs | art insta | twitter
