I thought if I'd ignored her things would be easier... this is not so. I'd hoped she might find time in her hectic life for me like old times... this not so. I suppose I should grow up about the whole thing. It's not happening and I need to move on. She's got him... She's happy... I want to think that's what I wanted. I want to be selfless. However utter selflessness is a heavy burden.
The worst of it comes in the night when my mind is hashing out all of it's problems and stresses, not quite asleep mind you, just conscious enough to wallow in doubt and anxiety. It wouldn't haunt me as much if I didn't reenact this scenario with another girl I really care about.
Well, so be it. I suppose one of us has to be the voice of reason in this world. Someone has to refer to Valentines Day as Corporate America Day. That's the day where I mock the sheeple.
I really hate the supposed to lose fights in RPGs. Why make me go through the load times and pointless cinematics just to have a computer mop the floor with me in one turn. I get that I can't beat them yet and that's cool. Why does the computer feel the absolute need to rub it in? That seems so... human...
Contemplating actually making "just-a-friend" jackets
~Kujo~
~Kujo~