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What is equally as hard is changing what you usually say to people. After countless trial-and-error tests in conversations, private or friendly, you might look back to what you would have said if you didn't think about the consequences your words might create for you. These last days I've been thinking differently on what I say or type to people, in r/l or in gaia. People do indeed feel hurt if something is read that wasn't supposed to be shared, even if you think you want to know, you don't. It's easy to keep secrets from people, not from lieing, but from just not telling them.
How many times a day do you think to yourself, "Should I ask/tell him/her? What would he/she think of me after that? How would it affect our relationship?" and end up not saying anything at all? I actually ask more questions...like, "Is it even worth saying, or even telling someone else? Would that person take it as someone trying to understand him/her or as someone who's being rude or inappropriate? What's the real reason why I want to know this thing anyway?" And by the time I'm done answering these things, I convince myself that I shouldn't say anything at all, leaving yet more questions unanswered.
What if you find out something about someone that makes you feel sad, or lied to? It should depend on how bad it was, or if it affects anyone else right? How do you break the news or give the correct hint to people about what you've found out? Should you just keep it in yourself and forget about it or confront them?
Life is confusing and hard to adjust with. The only one who I know right now of what I am talking about or who I know could help is someone who I acidentally saw doing something that made me feel sad..