I had a dream lastnight. it wasnt like some that i have had where passions burried deep come spilling over in my dreams because i cant control my thoughts when im asleep, but it was heartbreaking in the sence that it honestly showed my deepest desire, not crazy passion, not wild sex, but simply sweet contentment. something as simple as being held by the arms i yearn to have hold me, being lightly kissed by the man i actualy WANT to kiss me, and it was just so real feeling.(I felt his stubble when he kissed me) It was so everyday and ordinary that i think it actualy broke my heart to have to wake from it.I guess i was hoping somehow it was real but i must have known deep down that it wasnt. If only there was some way to make it real but without inventing either a money machine or a time machine i dont see how it could possibly be made real right now.
ive never been a patient girl. i hate that i have to wait for him. but i will. because i have no other alternative. damnit. time sucks. money sucks. working realy sucks. and im secretly hoping i get fired. i have a meeting with the principal today and im secretly hoping i did something wrong that i havent thought of and the meeting is to fire me..... damn. that is so unlikely it sucks.
 RACHEL THE BOB · Wed Feb 18, 2009 @ 09:01pm · 0 Comments |
