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Whisper and Tell
Welcome to my journal! This is where I just tell about myself, what I think, and maybe I might add stories. I'm not very orginazed with the journal part, so I might just mix them all up. But anyways... [color=darkblue] "The secrets that I tel
New World

Have you ever wished that you wanted to restart you whole life and make some changes. I had some feelings of that sometime now, because I know that I would make some really wrong choices. I know for sure that what I have choosen can't be changed, because all of that is now in the past. All I have to do is make a wish of a whole new world. A world that whatever I choose, then it would realy make a difference in my life. Something that would effect the way I live and would effect my feelings. I wanna start off fresh. I want to make a new start. Or if that doesn't work, then I wish that I can disappear and make something really happen. I want to be the person that everyone cared, but I feel sorry if people cared, cause sometimes, I think it's a lie. The world I live is always filled with lies.

I wanna change because I am always hiding myself into someone I'm not. I wanna live life the way that I can't make up lies and can't live in struggle. I wanna change the way I act also. I'm a coward for being myself and I hate myself for it! I can't even tell myself that I want this or not! I wanna forget every memory even though I am going to regret it so very much! A world that I can't regret anything is what I need to live in. I never wanted to be cared for cause I know that I would end up making them very sad. Making myself wish that I want to be gone. I want to be gone so that I can't make people feel sad anymore. One world that I can remember and maybe almost forget is mine. Will my loved ones be happy? I hope that people understand that. I wanna to make people happy, cause I don't want to be here.

One way to I want to be gone because I am at a really bad moment where I can't make people sad anymore. To make people happy for me, they would leave me alone in what I want to do. I feel so depressed because I will forget the ones I love. "Why? Because we're your friends." This is from Shan and all I want to say is because I know for a fact that my whole life is a lie to people. I have 3 people in one person, that is how much of a lie I am. In know that I won't be able to make people happy cause I am a tool that they use just for fun. Also I feel sorry for the people that cared for me because all I wanted was to disappear. I want them to forget me every moment because I'm not good enough to be cared about.

This is the world that I live in.

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User Comments: [2]
Anikacy
Community Member





Wed Jul 16, 2008 @ 11:10pm


Yeah i have, shan told me that, if i live my life to fullest, and if i put my lies and regrets behind me, i can live a better life, a better life where i can start new.

"Or if that doesn't work, then I wish that I can disappear and make something really happen" -- You

you cant just disappear and wait for something to happen, you have to be there to make something happen. you have to make it happen, I wanna make a rock band, now im making it happen. so you dont wait. and you know i'm always here when you need me, i care for you, even if sometimes you dont, i still do. Forever i will cherish you. and if you disappear now. theres nothing left for me. so dont go.... its not a lie that i love you its not, im always here for you....

i have my answer now. i choose you....


Shan123456
Community Member





Thu Jul 17, 2008 @ 10:55pm


Ayane is right. We're all here for you Luna smile . And you know, what you've said is partly right, it's good that you want to have a new start, and the thing that's really important is, you don't need to disappear or to enter a new world to do it. It's easy to make a new start, all you have to do is tell yourself what you want to change, and then, go out into the world, and change it! I know this may sound difficult, because right now, you can't change the people you meet or the people you have to live around, but trust me, even if you can't do that now, you will be in a few years, and you'll have full control over your life. It's ok to regret the past, but don't remember that all it should do is help you improve your future.
And also (sorry for the long message!), why do you feel sorry if people cared about you? Ayane cares about you. I do too. And so does a lot of other people. Don't feel sorry for us, because there's a reason we care, because you're our friend. smile
So if you have anything else on your mind, then tell us, and we'll try our best to support you. Why? You say? Well, because we care. smile


User Comments: [2]
 
 
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