zomg this is soo funny
it's quite funny i was looking threw this game and a user had this on his journal it's funny. and LADIES don't be shocked. i laughed and I'm female.
----------------------------------------------
Rules Men Wish
Women Knew
1. If you think you are fat, you probably are.
Do not ask us. We refuse to answer.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, Put it down.
3. Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair
is always more attractive than
short hair. One of the big reasons
guys fear getting married is that
married women always cut their hair,
and by then, you are stuck with her.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and
Anniversaries are not quests to see if
we can find the perfect
present yet again!
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
expect
an answer you do not want to hear.
6.
Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Do not ask us what we
are thinking about unless you are
prepared to
discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun
formation and monster trucks.
8. Sunday
= sports. It's like the full moon or
the
changing of the tides. Let it be.
9. Shopping is not a sport, and no, we are never
going to
think of it that way.
10. When
we have to go somewhere, absolutely
anything you wear is fine. Really.
11. You have enough
clothes.
12. You have too many
shoes.
13. Crying is blackmail.
14. Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot.
15. Ask for what
you want. Let us be clear on this
one:
Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work.
Obvious hints do not work. Just say
it!
16. No, we do not know what day
it is. We never will.
Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
17. Yes, peeing standing up is more
difficult.
We are bound to miss
sometimes.
18. Most guys own three pairs of shoes. What makes you
think we'd be any good at choosing
which pair,
out of thirty,
would look good with your dress?
19. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable
answers to almost every
question.
20. Come to us
with a problem only if you want help solving it. That
is what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are
for.
21. A headache that
lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
22. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
23.
Check your oil.
24.
Do not fake it. We would rather be ineffective than deceived.
25. It is neither in your best interest nor ours
to take the quiz
together.
26. No, it does not matter which quiz.
27. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an
argument.
All
comments become null and void after 7 days.
28. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls,
don't expect us to
act like soap
opera guys.
29. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of
the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the
other
one.
30. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it is genetic.
31. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to
come
out.
32. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us
how you want it done-not both.
33. Whenever possible, please
say
whatever
you have to say during commercials.
34. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.
35.
Women
wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose
their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
36. More women should
wear
Wonderbras and low-cut blouses.
We like staring at boobs.
37. The relationship is never going to be like it was
the first
two months
we were going out.
38. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like windows default settings.
Peach is a fruit, not a
color.
39. Pumpkin
is also a fruit.
40. If it itches, it will be scratched.
41. Beer is as exciting for us as handbags
are for you.
42. If it
is OUR house, I do not understand why
MY stuff gets thrown in the closet/attic/basement.
43. We are
not mind readers and we never will
be.
Our lack of mind-reading ability is not
proof of how little we care about you.
44. If we
ask what is wrong and you say
"nothing,"
we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are
lying, but it is just not worth the
hassle.
45. If we hear from an old
girlfriend, we will briefly
fantasize about having sex with her. But do not worry;
the fantasy
includes you AND her, together.
princezdarkness Community Member 
|
|
