The Past/Future

• Artist: Raev90
• Description: this is just a poem i wrote while listening to music, hope you enjoy it
• Date: 02/04/2009
• Tags: pastfuure

In the morning light
I see him standing there
The sunlight bathing him

The light reflecting off jis hair
His eyes shinning brighter
Him lppking so handsome

now I'm wondering
If giving him up
Was such a good idea

For our feelings were so one sided
We didn't see eye to eye
Our likes were complety different

Yes, we are different
Yes i gave him up
But i still miss him

But i gave him up
I no longer have a claim
So I shall move on

In the morning light
I see the past
And how it once was

BUt now i'm free
and i see it so clearly
and i see where my path leads me to now

Comments

[Kibroth]

I think this could become a great piece of work with a little more effort.

Do remember to spell check (and look it over).
Also, try to use more descriptive language, even using a dictionary if you have to (don't be shy, I do it too!).

I'd suggest reading Yeats for some great romantic poetry to get inspiration and ideas.

Regards,
-K

[5_Demonic Angel_5]

a few mistakes but overall i liked it biggrin 5/5

[Raev90]

first comment, please enjoy smile