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Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as 4's?
Do one legged ducks swim in circles?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
Do fish get cramps after eating?
Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car, he sticks his head out the window!
Did the early settlers ever go on a camping trip?
Did Adam and Eve have navels?
Could someone ever get addicted to counseling? If so, how could you treat them?
Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
Can I get arrested for running into a Fire House yelling Movie! Movie!?
Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?
Aren't all generalizations false?
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose?
Why do they call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere but call it a hemorrhoid when its in your a**?
If you lived in Siberia and you wronged the Russians government, where would they send you?
How can military troops be deployed if they have never been ployed to begin with?
What should one call a male ladybird?
What would you use to dilute water?
How come overtones and undertones are the same thing?
If you take an oriental person and spin him around a few times, does he become disoriented?
Why does Donald Duck wear a towel when he comes out of the shower, when he doesn't usually wear any pants?
If Barbie is so popular, then why do you have to buy her friends?
I know you can be overwhelmed, and I know you can be underwhelmed, but can you just be whelmed?
Why are turds pinched off at the end?
What would Cheese say if they got their picture taken?
What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?
If you're in hell, and are mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?
If you get cheated by the better business bureau, who do you complain to?
How does Santa get into a house that doesn't have a chimney?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?
Why do the ABC song, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and Baa Baa Black Sheep all have the same tune?
Why do grocery stores buy so many checkout line registers if they only keep 3 or 4 open?
Why did they name that underwear company fruit of the loom?
Is Disney world the only people trap operated by a mouse?
How can something be new and improved? if it's new, what was it improving on?
Why is it good to be a Daddy's girl, but bad to be a Momma's boy?
why do you get on a bus and a train but get into a car?
If the speed of movement is slower than the speed of light - how fast is a moving light?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why is it you get a penny for your thoughts, but have to put in your two cents worth?
If you fed a bee nothing but oranges, would it start making marmalade?
Why is it that when a person tells you there's over a million stars in the universe you believe them, but if someone tells you there's wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
If a Man is talking in the forest and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?
If The Flintstones were B.C. and before America, why did they have Flintstones Thanksgiving and Flintstones Christmas?
How come thaw and unthaw mean the same thing?
Is a hot car cool or is a cool car hot?
Is a man full of wonder a wonderful man?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
How can you hear yourself think?
How can you chop down a tree and then chop it up?
If Americans throw rice at weddings, do the Chinese throw hamburgers?
What's the difference between a wise man and a wise guy?
What would happen if an Irresistible Force met an Immovable Object?
Why do banks leave the door wide open but the pens chained to the counter?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests?
Where in the nursery rhyme does it say humpty dumpty is an egg?
What if the hokey-pokey really is what it's all about?
Why do they call it taking a dump? Shouldn't it be leaving a dump?
What happens if someone loses a lost and found box?
Why do they have handicap parking spaces in front of they skating rings?
Why do we leave expensive cars in the driveway, when we keep worthless junk in the garage?
Why is a person that handles your money called a BROKER?
Aren't you tired of people asking you rhetorical questions and you don't know if they are rhetorical questions or not?
If when people freak out they are said to be "having a cow", when cows freak out are they said to be "having a person?"
Why is it called lipstick when it always comes off?
If masochists like to torture themselves, wouldn't they do it best by not torturing themselves? and if so, aren't we all masochist?
If Wile Coyote had enough money for all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore?
Why do most cars have speedometers that go up to at least 130 when you legally can't go that fast on any road?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Have you ever wondered why Trix are only for kids?
Why do you click on start to exit Microsoft Windows?
If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception to that rule?
Can blind people see their dreams?
Where does the white go when the snow melts?
What came first, the fruit or the color orange?
Is a sleeping bag a nap sack?
If Pringles are "so good that once you pop, you can't stop" why do they come with a resealable lid?
Are zebras black with white stripes, or white with black stripes?
Did they have antiques in the olden days?
Why are pennies bigger than dimes?
If you dig a tunnel straight through the earth, will you come out with your feet first?
How come the sun makes your skin darker but your hair lighter?
What do you call male ballerinas?
Why do hotdogs come in packs of 8 when hotdog rolls come in packs of 10?
Why do they call it a black light when it's really purple?
Why is the blackboard green?
On the periodic table, why do some elements have symbols with letters that aren't even in the word?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If you try to fail and succeed, what did you just do?
Is the opposite of "out of whack" "in whack"
Why are toe nail clippers bigger than finger nail clippers when your toe nails are smaller than your finger nails?
If Practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?
What's the opposite of opposite?
Why do we scrub Down and wash Up?
Why is it when your almost dead your on deaths doorstep, but when your actually dead your not in deaths house?
Do sore thumbs really stick out?
If you accidentally ate your own tongue, what would it taste like?
If love is blind, how can we believe in love at first sight?
Why is an electrical outlet called an outlet when you plug things into it? Shouldn't it be called an inlet.
Why is an elevator still called an elevator even when its going down?
Can good looking Eskimo girls be called hot?
Why do birds have white poop?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning?
Why is it called eggplant, when there's no egg in it?
Why is it called pineapple, when's there neither pine nor apple in it?
Why are boxing rings square?
If somebody vanished without a trace, how do people know they are missing?
Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up "there" anyway?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but people don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why do people say "You scared the living daylights out of me" when daylight is not living?
Is the fear of flying groundless?
Do mimes watch silent movies?
Does peanut butter really have butter in it?
Why is it that cargo is transported by ship while a shipment is transported by car?
Why doesn't a chicken egg taste like chicken?
If the professor on Giligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, or just the movie itself?
Does a postman deliver his own mail?
If feathers tickle people, do they tickle birds?
Can you sentence a homeless man to house arrest?
What do people in China call their good plates?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink what ever comes out"?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why is the third hand on the watch called second hand?
Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
Why can magicians make things disappear into thin air, but not thick air?
Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
If you stole a pen from a bank then would it still be considered a bank robbery?
Why is it that lemon dishsoap is made with real lemons, but lemon juice is artificial flavoring?
Why are they called goose bumps? Do geese get people bumps?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?
Do vampires get AIDS?
Why are SOFTballs hard?
If Milli Vanilli fell in the woods, would someone else make a sound ?
Why does mineral water that has "trickled through mountains for centuries" go out of date next year?
Why is it called a "drive through" if you have to stop?
In France do people just ask for toast and get French toast? or do they have to ask for American toast?
If a transport truck carrying a load of cars gets into a car accident, does it increase the number of the cars in the pile-up?
Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
If croutons are stale bread, why do they come in airtight packages?
What do you call a female daddy long legs?
Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary?
Don't you find it worrying that doctors call treating you their "practice" ?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
What ever happened to an E grade? We have A,B,C,D,F but no E.
Isn't it kind of ominous to put your tax returns in the mail box and put up the little red flag?
Why do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
Why is Grape Nuts cereal called that, when it contains neither grapes, nor nuts?
If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them?
If Dracula has no reflection, how comes he always had such a straight parting in his hair?
Why do they put "for indoor or outdoor use only" on Christmas lights?
Does the President have to pay taxes?
Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?
If you mated a bull dog and a shitsu, would it be called a bullshit?
How fast do hotcakes sell?
If you wore a teflon suit, could you ever end up in a sticky situation?
Why is an alarm clock going "off" when it actually turns on?
Why are semi-trucks bigger than regular trucks?
What is a male ladybug called?
Since we see little birdies when we just get knocked out, what do little birdies see when they just get knocked out??
If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth?
Can a guy named Nick have a 'nick'name?
Do cows drink milk?
How come some Little Debbie snack cakes come in a twin pack and others are wrapped individually?
Why is it called football when you hardly use your feet?
Why do they call it an escalator if it takes you down?
How did the headless horseman know where he was going?
If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
Why is it called a TV set when there is only one?
Why would superman want to leap over the tallest building in a single bound if he can fly?
How do they get those boats in those glass bottles?
If someone can't see, they're blind and if someone cant hear, they're deaf, so what do you call people who can't smell?
Why is the name of the phobia for the fear of long words Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia?
 kipples · Fri Jun 16, 2006 @ 03:07am · 0 Comments |
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