Mum's coming back tommorow. Dad too of course. I almost wish they could stay a little longer. I get more time online while she's gone or too busy to deal. But grandma's constant nagging is going to kill me.
I also need to finish that damned paper. And then start on the research paper. And get Fences (insert:and King Lear) Oh yeah, and Ginzo finally broke up with me. Took long enough. Also need to find time to box up my room else it's going to kill me! And so Dad no longer has the excuse of my being in his way to keep him from doing the basement.
Yeah okay the whole 'live and forget' or building a brudge thing ain't working. Most of the time I hardly notice. I'm in so much pain and s**t constantly, it kinda blends into the rest of the constant weights of pain pressing on my chest, throat, and mind. But it also comes at me with knives stabbing me in the heart. I don't know if it'd hurt less if he told me he was leaving because he didn't love me or if it would've hurt worse. All I know is it hurts different from when he asked me if we had broken up and he was assuming yes (insert:like a month and almost a half ago). That felt a swift blow to the head with a flail leaving an aching emptiness.
On the plus side. No. Can't even think it at the moment. Keeps stabbing me. I'll add it in later. When it doesn't hurt so much.
Add-in 10-1:
On the plus side, I'm free to date whoever for a while. Get all the wildness out. Well some of it xd
 BSPBleach · Mon Oct 03, 2011 @ 11:43pm · 0 Comments |
