I trusted one of my closest friends with stuff i had told nobody IRL but diamond...She said she was scared for me that's why she told.. She thought that I might get raped by this person because he was older..adn that I barely knew him so why should i believe anything he said.. So she told her father this...she tells him everything now seeing as she barely sees him anymore..she told him and he told my mom..
My mom beat me down..angry and scared for me.. She said she doesn't even know me anymore.. I told her she's right she doesn't.....That earned me a nice smack across the face..My mom said I was too young to be going with a Man.. I said to her that she went with Daddy when she was 15 nad he was 20..what's the difference..Not like i've had sex with him... She slapped me again, her rings cuttin into my skin. Mom said that he doesn't love me..he's just using me to get closer to me and hurt me.. He'll hurt me bad then kill mr...He no different from other man you meet on the internet. Same as all the others - complete assholes.
I struggled to keep my calm, my hand clenching and unclenching into fists.. I said angrily "He's different, he's not like others" My mom eyes widen in mock surprise and she said "Different? oh then that makes him a One-of-a-kind a*****e then." and she laughed cruelly at me. I raised my hand to smack her hard across the face, just wanting to give her the same pain she's been giving me for all my life... but i put my hand down.. To slap my mother was a true death wish.. But It wasn't like things could get any worse anyway..
She's taken my phone...tv..bed.. music and books... and most of all the love of my life away...leaving me with a sleeping bag, clothes, writing material, and a crushed heart. Saying that I didn't deserve any of the good
things she and my farther provided to me. She said she's dealt with my s**t too long and Is tired of it. Just ******** tired. I simply rolled my eyes at her, somthing i never do to anyone. She took my belt that i had laying in my closet and hit my hard across the back...
I barely felt the sharp stingin sensation that i usually feel from belts with metal designs.. I knew that it had left a mark..but that's no different for the many other scars i have on me...I felt pain..beyond pain.. when she made me break up with my boy...that i knew.. any other pain.. would be nothin compared to this...
Anything else is little stuff..it doesn't matter.. i don't need it.. All i want to do now is die... i want to just sit in my corner and slowly fade away... I can't believe that my friend. since the 6th grade.. can't keep a simple secret.. and That when i called her back to talk to her about this. She said well you deserve it. She siad that I deserve any pain i get from my mom for going with this boy. And I think I know the real reason why she did this to me..
It's because She likes him too.
 SSJMoney · Tue Aug 02, 2005 @ 07:36pm · 11 Comments |
