Canvas of a love

• Artist: BlissfulBruisesSugarScars
• Description: A poem i wrote in english.. its a little stupid
• Date: 12/18/2011
• Tags: dreams personal

Give an extatic wave of color to a blank canvas,
And let your graceful dance enlight a simple waltz
Allow the waves of your sound flow like the ocean,
Accept all of ones uniqueness
The color of their soul,Their natural rhythm
The flow of their anceint blood,
Let it color canvas when alone
And cherish the sweet everything,The taste of their lips,the depth of their heart be your guide

Comments

[BlissfulBruisesSugarScars]

thnx 4 the tip! ive been getting better & writing more i just havent been able 2 post them

[Slinkenhofer]

You have a few misspellings, and the theme of a canvas and all its colors is slightly overshadowed by all the allusions to rhythm and dance. Find a way to tie the two together; maybe compare the brush strokes on the canvas to the smooth steps in the waltz.