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“You’re too young to know what love is!”
I’m sure some if not all of you have heard that at least once in your life from your parents or guardians. It’s partly true. When you’re a teenager or a young adult it’s not really possible to fully understand what love is.
Say you just met a guy or girl and you’re “totally into them”, you go on a couple of dates, kiss and hug a lot, and exchange small sappy gifts. You may sigh to your friends and say “oh~ I just absolutely love”… so and so.
You love him or her, yes, but it is only the first stage of love.
The first stage, the crush or puppy love, is one of the most pleasant. The Shyness and giddiness are enough to make fools of us all. There’s the constant nauseous feeling in the pit of your stomach that you don’t want yet can’t live without. The palms of your hands sweat whenever the object of your affection is close by. Your body shakes uncontrollably. You cling to them and they cling to you like it’s the last day of the world. You crave them more than the most addictive drug known to mankind.
It all builds up until you’re pushed into stage two: passion.
Relatively short lived, this is without a doubt the most fun stage of love. The raw animistic attraction, the need for their body pressed against yours, it’s enough to make anyone lose the ability to think clearly. But, while it may be fun and games for a while, if not thought through carefully it may be one of the roughest stages of love. Heartbreak often follows, complications dealing with children arise. This leads into stage three: strain, stress, and fights.
Each parent may have different ideas on how to raise the child or children. They may get distracted with work or other issues going on in the world. They could just regret ever having a child in the first place. Whatever the reason it is unavoidable to argue with your spouse or partner. If the fights are sever enough it could lead to a separation or divorce or even abandonment, leaving both parents and the child or children hurt, confused, and less trusting of the world around them.
But that’s not always the road taken. The bad can make the good that much better. For the many that can work out through the fights and raise the children to the best of their ability they are rewarded with stage four: friendship.
When the body is too old to reproduce anymore and it’s hard to have that “old spark” what’s left but friendship, the comfort and security of knowing that you lived a full life and did what was expected of you. You can sit back with your soul mate and relive the days you spent together and plan for the next great adventure; death.
If you strip away the pretty embroidery and sequins love isn’t as glamorous as people make it out to be. It’s a messy affair but one that’s well worth the trouble. Go ahead and sigh and say you love them because chances are you probably do.
- Title: What love is
- Artist: Vida Lea
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Description:
I was so sick of hearing people saying "You don't know what love is."
I wrote this short essay just to make it clear to myself that I do know what love is. Please note that this does not apply to all the types of love, just the romantic kind. It does not cover all the complications that can arise. I stripped everything away and just wrote about the four basic stages of love. - Date: 05/24/2009
- Tags: stageslove
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Comments (4 Comments)
- Little Dead Soldier - 01/09/2012
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It was really good.
I also notice that when people say that, "you don't know what love is" I feel like they really mean to say , "you don't know how hard it is to keep a marriage alive for 20 years with someone you are in love with". I often hear these words from angry and sad people :< - Report As Spam
- xX-Jak-killa-Xx - 07/13/2010
- really great
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- Digital Witness - 06/29/2009
- Except for one typo, (sever should be severe, I'm guessing) I thought it was very well written and concise. I really don't know too much about love and I've never thought of life past the crush stage, but when I think about it now, it's much more complicated than I ever thought it was. Thanks for giving me a little heads-up!
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- Evil Music Bunni - 05/24/2009
- humm I am very confussed of why you would keep taking about love!I men even when I was 9 I knew what love really was.Even if you don't know what I mean just don't think about it then.
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